1520. Just finish chatting with my friends, lee ling and ter yuan. I look around the room, there are only my father and I in this room. Father is fall asleep on the comfortable sofa, while I’m sitting on the floor and type out this diary.

       In this holiday, I want to:-

Learn to bake a cheese cake

Learn cooking from my mother

Play piano everyday

Tidy up my room

Read all story books that I bought before

Do my final year project – thesis

I was ashamed that I’m not even able to do one of them. Haha..maybe I’m too lazy, everyday stay at home watch drama, hanging around and sleep. Time flies day by day but I found I did not do anything while stay at home. It is not what I want to experience in this life. I want a wonderful and meaningful life, but not stay at home watch drama and sleep everyday. I think I should start to plan all activities in my daily life.

When women talked about problems, men always resist it. The more problems, the more he feels blamed. He does not realize that she is talking to feel better. A man doesn’t know that she will appreciate it if he just listens. Many times, woman just wants to share her feeling about her day, thinking he is helping and interrupt her by offering a steady flow of solutions to her problems.

If he assumes she is blaming him, then he draws his sword to protect himself from attacks. When he feels attacked, then he begins to defend himself. He thinks if he explains himself that she will stop blaming him. The more he defends himself, however, the more upset she becomes. He doesn’t realize that explanations are not what she needs. She needs him understand her feeling. Again he doesn’t realize that she is looking not for a solution from him but for his caring and understanding. Is it really so hard to understand?

      Back to Sabah in this morning at 8.30am. Feel very tired.. I get not enough sleep while in kuching, maybe it is because of not used to sleep on other people’s bed. Although very tired but i feel worth to go this trip..

      I had 4 nights and 3 days trip at kuching. After finish exam on 11th april, i directly head back to home and then go to airport after bath. It was only took 1 hour journey from sabah to kuching. After landed kuching airport, i found that that airport is much more beautiful than sabah airport!! There are many branded shops and also cafe to let us rest there. There are many shops which sell wines and alcohol, i starting wonder am i reach the right place, because i never hear kuching is famous in wine.

    Kar chuan’s friend,  chin yau was waiting for us outside the airport. He brought us to hawker centre which near the place we stay.That hawker centre is combination on malay and chinese food. There have sell Koo Lok Mee which is very famous in kuching, salad chicken rice, curry mee, and those typical malay foods. After having dinner, we went to some church mate’s house to stay a while and wait for him to arrange our place to stay on those few days.

      The second day, chin yau brought us go to cat’s museum after breakfast. There are plently of cat’s photos and status inside. We are so excited when see those picture and status because my bf is a cat’s lover. After visit cat meseum, we went to cultural park. Cultural park is a place which built up houses for different unic of people.  We went to watch the iban people dancing and watch them play different musical instruments. Their performances are fantastic!! We had enter a house which display different cultural games. There are pipe blow and coconut bowling and others. 3 of us got to play that game but don’t know why those 2 guys are bad in bowling. Most of the coconut enter "longkang". Reach my turn and i strict it!! Won 1 can of soft drink only but we got fun that day.. We head back home after spent around 5 hours at cultural park. All of us are exhausted. That night Christian fellowship organize activities at home and we have BBQ. We sleep around 12am that night..

      The next day, dear and me went to town ourselves. We went to museum, shopping centres and took many photo while we were passing different places. Kinda surprise when see thier shopping centres are so small. I always mummbling about sabah shopping centre is not nice and too small, but after reach kuching, i found that sabah is still much better.hehe..

      In the early morning, cindy brought us to have breakfast. I ate 1 kind of mee which is not able to find in semenanjung. The soup has a bit sour but it taste so great. After having breakfast, we went to tasik biru, fairy cave and wind cave. Once i reach outside of the wind cave, i thought that it is just a normal cave but once i enter it, i know i was wrong! There are so many bats,and birdnest inside. All bats are so near to us as some of them are just in front of us. The cave is very dark. We are not able to walk unless have touch light. The road is very slippery and we have to be very careful on every walk. I was very glad that we got rent touch light before enter. It was a very new experience for me.

      Some places might be quite boring in kuching as thier shopping centre is very small but the most interesting places can be also found there. It is what a nice and tired trip..

      I’m wondering is it only sabah or whole Malaysia is under the hot temperature now. I’m like staying in the microwave, sweating all the time and unable to concentrate study.. My next exam paper will be held on this coming thursday, haven’t finish preparing it yet but i’m trying my best to study. Of course, i’m not the one who can study 24 hours without stop. Games, drama, hanging around with my bf are cannot be less. This is the way to let me release tension.. Another way to say is.. "lazy".. hehe..

      I’ll be Kuching on next wednesday, kinda looking forward that day because i never go there before. Heard that have many delicious food there, want to try them and buy something nice food (if have) back to hometown for my parents and siblings. Want take more nice photo with my dear dear too.. yeah!!

      Tired.. It is 7.30 in the morning and it is such a good saturday. I should be sleep in the bed now since i not enough sleep for the last 2 days because of preparation on exam.. But the fact is i feel tired but can’t sleep..

      What is troubling me now? studied? relationship? I’m not sure..everything look good at outside but inside is nothing. Feel stress on studying. scare cannot score well in result.. Worry my future. For relationship, i don’t feel to talk much at it. Everything seem so well between us but i still hesitate over it. Is it a problem at me? Is it has too many things lure me?

      May god lead me to the brightest side..

Days passed so fast and i was sitting in front of my lap top and recorded down what had happend yesterday.

My course mates and i went to padas river water rafitng.In the early morning, my roommate and i went to bus stop wait for other friends come to meet us. The bas reach there around 7.30am. Everyone look so excited and less of tiredness although most of us get not enough sleep on the day before. The bus took about 1 and half hour to reach Beaufort. We have to take the train from Beaufort to Pangi which is the starting point of water rafting. Train should be reach at 10am and depart after a few minutes but after we waited for 45mintutes the train is still stay at the same place. Someone told us the train was broken down and need to take some time to repair. Everyone feel so hot and frustrated so we decided go out the train for a walk.

11.35am, train moved. We move back to the train and take another 1 and half journey to Pangi. It was an very old typed of train, can’t drive too fast and need to stop at each station after 7 minutes. All of us have no place to sit and need to stand in whole journey. Everyone start feel sleepy and dizzy. We reach there around 1pm. We got light refreshment there and the life guards gave us safety briefing for the water rafting. We were rafting on the Padas River. The end point will be at Rayoh and it need take about 1 hour to complete whole game. We start rafting after a while. 7 peoples form in 1 group and all of us were very excited. The waves in the river keep hitting us and we were nearly fall into the sea but everyone keep try to be balance and stay calm in the boat. We can choose to switch the place to sit while the game is proceed and the last time switch over I change to the front place. I don’t need to paddle that time but need to hold two big guys in front of me. As everyone should know I’m kinda weak. It is impossible for me to hold them tightly if the wave hit on us. Within expectation, when the wave comes, the wave pushed me to the back. Everyone are laughing because I’m not only can’t hold them but dragged them fall down also. But I really feel very fun that time.

When we reach the end point is already 2.30pm. We immmediately change the clothes and get our food as soon as possible because the train have to leave there at 3pm. All of us are so rush. We got lamb steak, chicken wings, sausages, rice, mee ,drinks and banana!! We sat the open air train because there was really too may people in the train. We enjoyed out lunch under the sun. Everything seem so good but the train suddenly STOP!! The train was spoil again!! We feel so hot and everyone are like in sauna. Some of us use towel to over our face while eating our lunch. If u were with us, you’ll sure feel that we are like the illegal worker come from Indonesia.

Time passed very fast and the train was fixed at 6pm.
It send us to another station and we changed to another small train which can be drink in 107km speed. Everyone of us like dancing in the train because we have to balance our body and prevent to fall down. We have to hold something tightly. It is a very good experient for me in this trip. I got to try many new things and have fun with all my friends.

p/s: water rafting is not as fun as I thought.. I feel it so so only..

      There are many small island in sabah. When i was first year, seniors took us to pulau sapi and mamutik but today, i follow my bf and friends to pulau manukan!hehe..

      Today is a sunny day. My bf and i went to jetty around 9am and meet adrian and his gf there. Boys are mostly more gentlemen so they went to buy the ticket and let girls wait for them. Surprisingly, the ticket can be get discount by using student card~ it made me pay extra RM3 because of forgotten brought my matric card (-_-)|||

      We reach manukan after 20min.We are so excited when reach there. The sea is very bright and clear but sadly cannot see any fish without snokeling to the deep sea so we rented 4 snokeling set and start our hunting fishes game. Doesn’t have many corals there but can found sea cucumbers everywhere. I need to be very careful when walk in the sea, just in case i step on them. Besides that, i need to suffer from the pain by hurt by dead coral when go near the beach. Fishes in the sea are so colourful. Those fishes get near to us even we don’t have bring bread for them.We are swimming in the sea, hunt for fishes and beautiful corals. All of us had fun today.

      We went back home around 3.30pm and i reach home at 4.30pm. Luckily we come back home early because it was raining after a while i reach home. My skin had been darker, but i feel it’s worth it because i’m very enjoy the trip today. (^_^)

Time was passed so fast and after 3 more weeks I’ll go back to jb and reunion with my family. Kinda looking forward for that day because It’s been more than 4 months I never meet them.

I’ll be having my final exam on the next coming 2 weeks. I was so shocked when see the exam time table .I was hardly find any free time to relax when exam start. Exam will proceed everyday without stop, except on Saturday and Sunday. I start to wonder what kind of university is it? Mid term exam just had passed and it continue coming with the final exam with only give us 2 weeks break. Everyone in my course are nearly mentally breakdown. But luckily we will also find leisure although in exam time..

Seeing all my friends are so anxious for this final exam, I was getting guilty for too lazy.i think I have to start to burn midnight oil from tonight and please don’t be surprise when you got to see me still online in the early morning before sunrise. I used to study until that time. I’m sure you’ll see a panda keng after my final exam. (^_^) but it’s kinda cute isn’t it..hehe…just kidding.

   One week holiday passed so fast~ still remember that morning i woke up late and rush to the bus station to sandakan for this holiday trip.It was the 1st time i go to the trip with my 3 coursemates.Of course the tour guide are that 2 silly sandakan boys- kenny and bobby.

   We took 6 hours journey to reach sandakan.Hardly to see anything when in the bus because everywhere are trees, i start to wondering are my friends staying on the tree.One of the advantage of the sleeping bug is they will attack me while i have nothing to do in the bus.5 hours journey is so easy to pass..hehe…

   Sandakan is like a small town of Muar. The road is very easy to recognize as the 2nd time my friends brought me out then i can recognize the ways to go town.Sandakan is known as a city of nature.The most popular things and what we must see when we go there are proboscis and orang utan. Proboscis and orang utan are not coming out all the time.If we want to see them then have to go at the feeding time or else it’s hardly to see them come out from the forest. Foods that they used to feed proboscis and orang utan are very different. Proboscis are feed by cucumber, pan cake(without sugar) and drink plain water while orang utan are feed by banana and drink milk. Both of them are so cute and u can found that orang utan are really very similiar with human being.

   Besides visited proboscis and oran utan, we also went to crocodile farm and other historical places such as memorial park, sandakan oldest church which is build by protugal and san jiao shi.5 days trip are passed so fast and it’s time to go back uni life agian..  Mid term has starting now. Life is getting busier and busier. Hey, all my friends there, how are you guys now??

What is the feeling of warm?? It’s happy?touching?? or both? Someone made me having this feeling today. He is one of my buddy. He is also one of the guy who care me lots since many many years ago. As all of my friends will know that who ever treat me good, I’ll return the kindness to them in the same way. Unfortunately, I feel I have never treat this friend good at all. I used to bully him when I were young. But he never leave me when I need someone by my side. He’s the one who always fulfill all my wishes. I feel I’m so lucky to know him..

It happened in this afternoon. He called me and asked me out to collect something. I feel so puzzled when hear he sounded so urgent and wanted me go to the front door in 1 minute. I feel so shock when I saw the food in the plastic bag.. It was some kind of food that I mention few days ago in the phone when talked to him. This kind of food is very hard to buy. It’s not because the food is very special but it is because that stall is too popular.As I know, he went the stall 4 times just manage to bought me that food. I just “cincai cincai” mention that day and now it is in front of me.. I feel so touch!

Really feel sorry that I never care him so much as he treated me before.. Have a bit feel guilty now..hehe…